You’re guilty! You know you are. You’re one of those women who look for any excuse to get in touch with your ex, right? I’ve been there, most women have. We just can’t seem to let that one man go. He’s really the one we always imagined we’d end up with. But something went wrong, a break up happened and now you’re pining away for him. You know better. You know it’s not helpful for you to call him and then hang up after hearing his voice and you know that you’re accomplishing nothing but wasting time when you sit outside his apartment waiting to catch a fleeting glimpse of him. You probably tell yourself that there’s nothing wrong with any of that, right? You know that’s not true. Now that his birthday is approaching, you’ve got one question on your mind, “should I call my ex boyfriend on his birthday?” Guess what I’m going to suggest you do? That’s right, I’m going to tell you not to go anywhere near the phone.
Calling your ex boyfriend on his birthday may seem like a perfect opportunity to make some idle chit chat with him all the while hoping he’ll suddenly come to his senses and want you back. That’s all fairytale thinking, ladies. Reality paints a much clearer picture. If you call your ex and wish him well on his birthday you’ll be opening yourself up to some major pain and disappointment. Here’s why. Either he’s going to call screen and not pick up because he wants to avoid having any awkward encounters with his ex on his special day or he’ll answer and the entire conversation will be filled with long pauses and comments about the weather and work. You can’t expect a former flame to welcome you back with open arms just because you’re calling to tell him you want him to have a great day.
Here’s what you should be doing when his birthday rolls around. You can pretend that you don’t remember. This can actually work really well in your favor if you play it right. By that I mean you let the actual date of his birth pass without any contact and then a few days later you send him a short text message wishing him a belated happy birthday. What this accomplishes is it shows him that your world doesn’t still revolve around him. Even if it does, you just never want him to know that.
The other approach you can take on his birthday is to just send the text message on the actual day. It should say nothing more than, “Happy Birthday.” No pet names attached to that like baby, honey or sweetie and absolutely no mention of how much you miss him or how you can’t live without him. This is one time when it’s imperative that you keep it short and sweet. If he doesn’t respond, don’t sweat it.
Self restraint is the best present you can give your boyfriend, and for that matter, yourself on his birthday. No one, be it a man or a woman, wants to share their life with someone who is emotionally immature or unable to move forward from a break up. By not making a big deal out of his birthday you’ll be showing him that it’s just another day of the week to you. That way you’ll keep your self esteem intact and there’s nothing more important than that.